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October 26, 2004
wait.. what?
so out of nowhere, I've been having fun. Nothing major. But instead of going home to watch wrestling last night, I stood in the parking lot with Melinda. She's rad. We're supposed to see The Grudge tonight. And i'm trying to act like i'm not scared of it. She totally sees through me though.
Thursday is our Grand Re-Opening night at Target. I have to get some new clothes for it, since they said I can't wear what I normally wear, because It's not really red and khaki. I'm going to be outside in the cold. I'm wearing my sweater still. Especially since they won't pay me until friday. And I'm spending the last of my money tonight.
I can't get enough of the Lost Boys soundtrack. Don't Cry Little Sister is amazing. I forgot how that song is. It makes me want to watch the movie every time I hear it though. Which isn't bad.. Because I love it. I want that double disc special edition they just put out.
Vegas Vacation. It rules my dvd player.
I really like the homestarrunner puppets.
Posted by Cameron at 06:09 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
October 21, 2004
give me the storm's heart
I need some advice.
And my advice isn't helping me because it's not logical to me.
part of me wants to tell everyone I know everything I'm feeling. another part of me wants nothing to do with anyone. I think that part is winning. There are so many things I think my father should know, but I'm not telling him. Same with my mother and sister. Although, it seems like I don't care if they know or not, because them knowing isn't going to change anything. And I'm sure it won't phase them, but make me feel even more awkward around them than I do. This is supposed to be my home. Yet, every time they walk by me, I feel like I shouldn't be here. I feel like they think I shouldn't be here. I'm Gregor in Kafka's Metamorphosis. I know nobody wants me around. And they'd all be better off without me.
Why do you read my blog?
Posted by Cameron at 11:26 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack
October 17, 2004
i'm only happy when it rains
Target.
I go in to work at 2 pm. I'm scheduled until 10:45 pm. I get out at 2:45 am. I felt depressed all day. I didn't get shit done at work, since we had 1 cashier all night. All of us had to be up there cashiering all night. The store looked like shit. I felt like shit. I was scheduled to be there at 7:30 am this morning.
I walked out the doors tonight about 3 hours into my shift saying fuck it. I was going to quit. I sat in my car for about 20 minutes. Then went back in. I hate Target. So the store closes at 10, and it's a mess. Candace, Gracie Chris and I are the only ones there to put it together. I sat down with Gracie and had a short talk. It was one of those talks where we both just click. She seems to be able to tell right away what I'm feeling. It's weird. Either nobody else ever has, or they have never said anything. She always knows. It was a good talk.
So 2 am comes, and it starts pouring rain. The backroom gets flooded by a crappy pipe job. The HBA stockroom gets flooded. So up on the roof I go. Along with Candace. We're looking at all the places water is being held up. There is just a huge puddle across most of the roof. I guess someone didn't plan it out very well. So we're up on the roof, in the pouring rain with nothing we could do. So back down we go, soaking wet, into the store. Candace calls the store manager, and she tells us to leave because it's a hazard. Or something. Candace didn't relay the message too well. So we left, leaving half of the store a total mess. At least my department was somewhat done. But she gave me the go ahead to not come in tomorrow. I told her I wasn't coming in at 7:30 if i'm staying until 2:45 anyway.
I forgot where I was going with this.
But it was a pretty cool ending to a really shitty day.
total was totally beautiful and cloudy.
and rainy.
Posted by Cameron at 03:11 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
October 15, 2004
does this page make your computer slow?
A few certain browsers seem to have a hard time viewing this page. It may just be on my computer. Let me know.
I got home from work tonight about 2 hours after I was supposed to.
I hate this.
I need a drink and all we have is 2% milk. Fuck 2% milk.
Yeah, I don't have shit to say.
I need a new Strong Bad shirt. Preferably this one.
Posted by Cameron at 12:22 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack
October 11, 2004
More like IsGAYel
I feel like I'm going to get fired.
I'm not. But I feel like it.
Stupid Ismael and his stupid.
Posted by Cameron at 02:18 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
October 10, 2004
Well
I was supposed to play some DDR and watch degrassi last night. Monica's son was really sick. So we just kinda sat at her place and they both fell asleep. So I talked to her brother for a bit, played some smash bros, left her a note, and took off.
I ended up seeing Team America, which is awesome. I'm glad I put up with so many stupid people to see it. It takes a lot to get me to a sneak preview. I hate sold out theaters. Especially on saturday nights. Last night was good. Usually, i'd get really anxious and end up going home before it starts. I hate being around so many people.
Monica's ex-boyfriend was there.. that was kind of weird. I ended up sitting right next to him. I wonder if he still hates me for allegedly dating Monica. (apparently, everyone in Target still thinks we're dating) Ehdaf.
I want to be Harry Potter for Halloween.
Posted by Cameron at 12:32 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
October 08, 2004
Ugh
Fuck today.
Fuck target.
Fuck Kylie.
Fuck Kim.
Fuck Ismael.
Fuck Cal Poly.
Posted by Cameron at 09:59 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
Me + Blog = Bad
Today feels very blah. I don't want to work. I don't want to play video games. I'd like to just lie on the couch and watch Degrassi all day. I know when I go into work, they will ask me to stay all night. And i'll probably say yes like i always do. But boy do i not want to. I need something or someone new around here. It's all just the same thing.
My damn prof won't add me to his class so I can submit the online assignments. He keeps telling me i need to do this, and talk to this person. Well I've done that for two weeks now and they all tell me he has to add me manually. So i tell him, and he tells me to see someone else. gah!
Target got in the furry snap bracelets again. They are red and green for christmas, and I'm going to pick them up tonight. Then i can wear them with my santa hat after thanksgiving when I'm doing the christmas trees.
Man, today is hot and overcast. What the hell is that.
Total is so not beautiful and cloudy.
Woo.
*cough*
tough room.
Posted by Cameron at 12:46 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
October 03, 2004
i am too weak to be your cure
I've been talking to a lot of new people lately. I don't know how I like it. It's weird being able to go into Target and just talk to people I never even looked at before. I don't know if I never wanted to talk to them, or I was just too scared to do so. If I were just scared, I don't know why. I couldn't care less if they don't like me.
It appears that the photo labs in Target (which I was going to work for a few months back) are becoming part of Target, instead of Qualex or whatever company it is. So, everyone is getting laid off and Target is going to staff them.. I guess it's good that I didn't go there.
This takes me way too long.
if i could i would shrink myself
sink through your skin to your blood cells
remove whatever makes you hurt
but i am too weak to be your cure
is this the way a toy feels when its batteries run dry
i am the watch you always wear but you forget to wind
Posted by Cameron at 11:10 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack